Take a look at David Brook’s article today on elite boot camp parenting. I wish I’d said what he says best about the importance of social skills and emotional intelligence to success (not to mention happiness). Naturally, these are the skills one needs to negotiate effectively as well.
Excerpt below – thanks to Stephanie West Allen for the link:
Practicing a piece of music for four hours requires focused attention, but it is nowhere near as cognitively demanding as a sleepover with 14-year-old girls. Managing status rivalries, negotiating group dynamics, understanding social norms, navigating the distinction between self and group — these and other social tests impose cognitive demands that blow away any intense tutoring session or a class at Yale.
Yet mastering these arduous skills is at the very essence of achievement. Most people work in groups. We do this because groups are much more efficient at solving problems than individuals (swimmers are often motivated to have their best times as part of relay teams, not in individual events). Moreover, the performance of a group does not correlate well with the average I.Q. of the group or even with the I.Q.’s of the smartest members.
Researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and Carnegie Mellon have found that groups have a high collective intelligence when members of a group are good at reading each others’ emotions — when they take turns speaking, when the inputs from each member are managed fluidly, when they detect each others’ inclinations and strengths.
Participating in a well-functioning group is really hard. It requires the ability to trust people outside your kinship circle, read intonations and moods, understand how the psychological pieces each person brings to the room can and cannot fit together.
From Maria Simpson's 2-Minute Training listserv One of the most conflict-ridden situations is that moment when our emotions take over our ability to respond thoughtfully, especially to a disagreement with a...
By Maria SimpsonThe current U.S. presidential election is a great time to think about the relationship of politics, conflict and leadership. The collective challenges we face -- balancing freedom and security, maintaining...
By Peter AdlerTexas Collaborative Law BlogIn a recent blog post, Adryenn Cantor, a San Diego, CA attorney included an excellent list of five questions for people to ask themselves to determine if...
By Dick Price
With the purchase of a Featured Membership, you will be shown on the front page of Mediate.com to web site visitors from your city and region (“state” if you are in the USA). You may appear in more than one city/region by purchasing additional locations.
