From the Real Divorce Mediation Blog of Nancy Hudgins and Debra Synovec
Both of these processes usually involve the so called “mediator” giving their evaluation of some aspect of the issues and often times take place with the cleints in separate rooms; these methods fly in the face of real mediation, which is interest based and promotes self-determination. These methods are coercive and adjudicatve processes and clients generally find them to be extremely unsatisfactory.
So the first thing to ask a mediator is: Do you use a facilitave style or an evaluative or directive style?
If they say an evaluative or directive style, or if they do not know what you are talking about, call another mediator who is able to effectively mediate using a facilitative, non-evaluative style…after all…it is your life!
In my seminars on interpersonal negotiation skills, communication, conflict management and mediation skills, we often speak about cultural and gender differences. Do Hispanics really make less eye contact than non-Hispanics?...
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