It seems that sometimes when we begin to have an argument with someone the focus isn’t on moving things forward. We might find ourselves getting stuck in blame, spending time asserting our perspective, disagreeing on the ‘right’ outcome, becoming angrier and resentful, and demonstrating other destructive reactions that keep us from progressing in constructive ways.
Emotions get the best of us the more we argue to be right and make the other person wrong! Once that happens and our amygdala is hijacked, reasoning and problem-solving get lost. Restoring the relationship, regaining equilibrium and resolving matters no longer fit into the dynamic. The aim of argument, as in the quote that heads this blog, doesn’t have any chance at these times.
This week’s Conflict Mastery Quest(ions) blog invites you to consider an argument you are currently involved in or recently have been in as you answer these questions:
From the Indisputably blogThe law generally doesn’t do much to promote apologies. They aren’t included in the panoply of remedies that judges can impose on unwilling parties. Even if courts...By John Lande
Thank you – Shirli Kirschner, Air New Zealand, Gerald Raftesath, Cindy Last - and all of the other committee members and conference planners (Lawyers Engaged in ADR (LEADR) Annual Conference,...By Christina S. Merchant
Reprinted from: "Hawaii Pacific Architecture", January 1995 Copyright © 1996 THE ROSENTHAL GROUP All Rights Reserved ADR Techniques have long been a recognized method of controlling litigation costs and resolving...By Richard J. Rosenthal