Find Mediators Near You:

A Negotiation Emergency?

Originally published in the Kluwer Mediation Blog

“For nobody would understand,
And you kill what you fear,
And you fear what you don’t understand.”

Powerful words. As a progressive rock music aficionado, these lyrics taken from the song “Duke’s Travels” by my favourite band, Genesis, have often brought me up short as I listen to the album from which they come, 1980’s “Duke”.

“You fear what you don’t understand.” And you kill it. Whatever “it” is. A person, a group, a philosophy, an institution, an idea.

The lyricist concludes:
“You’re on your own until the end.
There was a choice but now it’s gone,
I said you wouldn’t understand,
Take what’s yours and be damned.”

Lack of understanding, bequeathing a zero-sum outcome. Be damned.

We are all losers. How familiar is that?

As we head for a “do or die” Brexit in the UK, these words have a poignant resonance. Let’s kill it. Death is now perceived to be better than working really hard to face the realities of our complex situation. How did we get here?

And what happened to the art of conflict resolution? Where was mediation – or at least a mediative approach? Was it tried? Did it fail? In this most important of issues for post-World War 2 Europe, why did we not Get to Yes? Why have we failed to Get Past No?
Where was The Third Side? Did anyone try to Mediate Dangerously?
Books with these titles adorn my bookshelves. Must the ideas contained in them always stay there, on the shelf?

The need for a “Conflict Revolution” is clear. We have a Negotiation Emergency at the same time as we have a Climate Emergency. Perhaps mediators need their own Extinction Rebellion.

                        author

John Sturrock

John Sturrock is the founder and senior mediator at Core Solutions, Scotland's pre-eminent provider of commercial mediation services. As a pioneer of mediation throughout the UK and elsewhere, his work extends to the commercial, professional, sports, public sector, policy and political fields. He is a Distinguished Fellow Emeritus of the… MORE >

Featured Members

ad
View all

Read these next

Category

Can You Have a Mediated Divorce If You Are Angry At Your Spouse?

Anger is a normal feeling to have during a divorce. In fact, if you didn’t feel angry there would probably be something very wrong. Usually, one person has been unhappy...

By Rachel Fishman Green
Category

Is it Time to Go?

Kalamazoo Mediation by Jeff MurphyCheck out the article about divorce counseling in the personal Journal section of the April 3, 2012 issue of the Wall Street journal: www.wsj.com. Instead of...

By Jeff Murphy
Category

Making Friends Among the Taliban” with Ankur Delight

In this episode of the Conflict Tipping podcast, host Laura May is joined by returning guest Ankur Delight, mediator and founder of a funk collective, to discuss Making Friends Among the...

By Laura May
×