If you’re going through a divorce or a rough business settlement, it’s safe to say your life has been stressful lately. While many people view their mediators as part-time marriage therapists, there are definitely other ways to reduce the stress you’re feeling about mediation.
Research shows that breakups trigger psychological distress as well as a decline in life satisfaction.
There is no good side to being anxious. It affects your mood as well as your mental and physical health. It can also linger unwantedly after your problems have already been resolved.
The lower your stress levels are, the better you will be at handling the challenges that are coming your way. If you’re looking for business or relationship advice or you simply want to reduce the frustrations you’re feeling about mediation, meditation can help. Here’s how.
1. Reduce Stress
Mediators aren’t marriage therapists, but if we were, we might give you this relationship advice: stress and anger can ruin your marriage – and your mediation process – faster than any other emotion. The side effects of stress include
l Chest pain
l Pessimism
l Difficulty relaxing
l Loss of libido
l Low self-esteem
l Inability to concentrate
l Easily frustrated
l Poor judgment
l Upset stomach
l Avoiding friends and family
l Headaches
l Constant worry
The good news is that a study of more than 3,500 adult participants revealed that meditation helped reduce stress. It does so by reducing the inflammation response that is caused by the stress hormone cortisol.
2. Meditation helps you stay sharp
It goes without saying that you need your brain. Not only do you need it to function on a daily basis, but you want it to be sharp and focused, especially during meditation. This will ensure you are speaking clearly and making positive decisions for your circumstance.
Research indicates that meditation can actually help improve brain health. It has been shown to preserve brain structure and function and reduce age-related decline.
3. Renews a sense of control
There is nothing worse than feeling like you’ve lost control of your own life. Often, during meditation, the future of your marriage, money, and time spent with your children isn’t only up to you. It’s up to your ex-partner. This can leave you feeling helpless, angry, and even bitter about the situation unfolding.
Meditation can help you feel like you’ve taken some of the control back in your life. It allows you to picture the life you want for yourself and to focus on all the steps you need to take to make your dreams a reality.
4. Improve attention span
There is no doubt that we are a very distracted society. We have smartphones and devices, streaming services, and have the ability to bring work home with us all with the swipe of a button. Our minds are constantly inundated with information, entertainment, and emotions.
While there are many different types of meditation you can practice, for the most part when you meditate it means you are thinking deeply on a subject or question. This can help you center your mind and come at a problem from all angles.
Mediation has been shown to help individuals strengthen their attention span and improve task-focus.
There are many studies available highlight the amazing powers of meditation on the mind. For example, in this study workers who meditated regularly were able to remember specific details of their tasks better than their co-workers who did not meditate.
5. Banish anger
The key to using meditation for reducing anger is to allow your thoughts to come to your mind, but don’t give any power to them. Allow yourself to access the thoughts that are causing you to feel angry or upset, but don’t give weight to them. Just allow them to exist.
Or perhaps you want to do a deep-dive and allow the angry thoughts to sit in your mind and dissect how and why they make you feel that way. Understanding how you are triggered can help you take control of your emotions in the future.
6. Reduce anxiety
Many people today suffer from anxiety, especially in stressful situations like mediation or divorce. Much like stress, anxiety can be detrimental to your emotional and physical health.
Again, meditation can help. Studies show that not only does meditation reduce symptoms of anxiety, but anxiety disorders as well. Study participants revealed decreased symptoms for obsessive-compulsive behaviors, social anxiety, and panic attacks.
Meditation is not about stopping your mind or refusing to dwell on the negative. Rather, it’s a way to give attention to your thoughts without letting these thoughts bother you.
How to Meditate
If you want to meditate, you’re going to want to set the scene. No, this doesn’t mean you have to light candles and start doing yoga (though honestly, it couldn’t hurt!)
Start by finding a quiet space where you can relax. There is no point meditating if you are going to have the TV blaring in the background.
Write down what you want to meditate on. It could be relationship advice, something your divorce or marriage therapist said about meditation, focusing on your children, how to build your business – anything!
Focus on your breathing. Taking steady, slow breaths will calm your nerves and help you relax and enjoy the process.
Make it a practice to meditate daily for at least five or ten minutes. This is what will give you the most results.
When you meditate, commit. Be willing to allow frustrating or upsetting thoughts to enter into your mind. Acknowledge your emotions, accept them, and move past them. This can help reduce daily frustrations, stress, and improve your health.
Mediators may not be marriage therapists, but we do have good counsel to give.
The best relationship advice you can follow: When you are doing meditation, you want your mind to be in tip-top shape. Meditation can help you let go of frustrations and see the situation for what it is.
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