Conflict Remedy Blog by Lorraine Segal
What would you do if someone secretly took grapes from your garden? Would you get mad? Feel like a victim? Blame the neighbors and call them thieves? Put up a fence to protect your property? Post angry warning signs?
All of those are common understandable responses, but they tend to perpetuate a conflict and often lead to escalation and feuding as neighbors defend themselves, counterattack, and blame. Instead, one young woman, Elly Hartshorn took a creative and much more peaceful approach.
Elly Hartshorn started a non profit educationally oriented vineyard in a community garden in one of the city’s poorer areas. It is all run by volunteers, with the purpose of “educating urban people about the realities of wine and grape growing.” The whole project sounds worthwhile, but what caught my attention, and touched my heart, was a conflict they had and how beautifully it was resolved.
Disappearing Grapes
After the Pinot Noir grapes began to grow on their plot, Elly and her volunteers noticed that grape bunches were repeatedly disappearing. Rather than being outraged, or putting up fences to protect the grapes, Hartshorn decided to “plant vines for table grapes near the garden’s perimeter, which the local residents could easily pick.”
Harmony instead of conflict.
What an elegant solution! Instead of creating an “us vs. them” hostility, she understood the needs of the low income residents, who wanted fresh grapes to eat. She provided that and preserved the wine grapes. She built good will instead of barriers.
The same approach works with organizations.
I encourage and guide the organizational and corporate managers and HR professionals I work with to follow the same kind of process with their supervisors, co-workers, employees:
When we can do this, we can all enjoy the sweet fruits of harmony!
Quotes are from the article Wine Country in the City by Jon Bonné —SF Chronicle 8-2-15.
Collaborative law is a form of alternative dispute resolution for divorcing couples who prefer not to endure litigation, but desire vigorous legal representation. One of the first issues of concern...
By Laurie IsraelRecently I've seen a number of mediation situations where contract issues are in dispute as a result of unfulfilled expectations by a customer. In each of these cases an employee...
By Joanna WaresTerry Wakeen describes her satisfaction from helping people to negotiate and resolve their conflicts.
By Teresa Wakeen